Week One Ends With a Question (of course it does!).

My first week with Armani is almost over - and he's still alive!  And still sound!!

It's been a very busy week with Alex in Whitehorse and me at the barn almost every night. Hazel thought I was the world's worst dog owner, despite getting an hour's walk through the woods in the morning Monday and Wednesday before work, and then putting her in daycare Tuesday and Thursday so she could stay home in the evening.

On Monday, I brought her with me to the barn because it's too dark now when I get home to take her to my off leash places - too creepy. At least at the barn I can walk around in the dark without being afraid of creeps in the bushes. There are coyotes but they don't bother people. After running around a bit I put her in the car and parked in my usual spot next to the arena. I got Armani and handwalked him around the arena so he could explore. When I was all done, I opened the back door expecting to see Hazel sleeping or sitting there quietly waiting for me. Instead she was curled into a ball with her tail between her legs, shaking. Her fur felt damp so she must have been panting up a storm. The best I can figure is the sound of the horses trotting and cantering in the arena must be a bit like thunder and/or fireworks. Poor girl, I think her fears are getting worse. Alex told me last week he was watching a war movie and realized she wasn't with him at some point. He found her hiding in the basement :-(

I knew I couldn't try that again on Wednsday so I gave up and stayed home. I mean, that's one of the advantages of indoor board, right? I was too tired to handle a car or a horse anyway.

I rode Thursday with a little more purpose than my first indoor ride and was of course rewarded with more focus from Armani in return. It is really fun to be so impressed with his maturity on one hand and then a minute later he'll do something that is classic baby. I'm enjoying learning these nuances about him.

I mostly worked on within- and- between gait transitions at the walk and trot, having him moving promptly off my leg, and not leaning on my inside leg through the turns. He finds it hard because he has to carry himself more than he's used to. I'm there supporting him but I am not going to hold him up by his face like he's been used to. I believe I had moments last night where he started to get that he could stretch down and relax while really working from his back end and the feeling was lovely. Fleeting, but I'll take it as a good sign on ride 2!

I need to start wearing my digital watch again so I can hit the timer when I start my ride. For some reason I cannot remember what time I start a ride if I'm wearing a regular watch. I feel like a simpleton but apparently I have to see actual numbers because I promptly forget where the heck the big hand was positioned when I started :-/

Friday night, Alex was home and wanted to come see his horse ;-)  So we went and Armani was at the auto-waterer near the gate. Great!, I thought, I wouldn't have to trudge to the hay feeder to get him. I walked up to the gate, Armani took his face out of the water, took one look at me and trotted off to the hay. Argh!

But I laughed, figuring this was a good sign that he liked his increased turnout (he went from 7am-1pm to our 6am - 7:30/8pm winter schedule). I went to get him, no problem, and he lead in easily. The first couple days he was "sticky" coming in at night because any little movement would make him stop and look.

Today was another story. It was a complicated day with a dressage clinic going on. I planned to ride outside while the clinic was going on in the arena, and then watch my friend's ride. The second I got to the barn, I knew there was no way I was riding outside. WIND! Suck the life out of your bones kind of wind. It wasn't that cold but this time of year is the worst here because the air still holds a lot of humidity, making it feel a lot colder than the dry bulb temp would have you think.

Anyway, I ended up doing some scrapbooking. We make a scrapbook every year for the barn owners as a Christmas present. Then I watched my friend's ride while huddled in 6 layers of sweaters and jackets and double-wrapped in my wool cooler. By the end of the clinic I was feeling psyched to work with my baby but SO did not want to ride. I had been freezing for hours, it was getting dark, and I had not yet had Armani in the indoor alone.

I know riding alone is inevitable and I'm totally game and always say the horse has to learn to deal with having other horses come and go or none at all...I just wasn't sure I was in the right mental place to try it in the first week. I know he'd be fine but if I am wishy-washy than it will be ME that messes it up. I knew I was feeling wishy-washy.

Regardless, I did want to change Armani's blanket. Here is where you'll shake your head at me, probably. When I got to the barn and realized how windy it was, I knew Armani would probably be a bit cold since he was only out in a rainsheet (it's been warm during the day and he's in at night). I decided it would be a good day to stress his system a little, hoping he'll start growing a bit more coat. He's got nothing, given his turnout regime before.

Since I was there for hours, I spied on him lots. He spent most of the time by himself in or near the shelter while everyone else was at the hay. Sometimes his new best buddy (the outcast of the herd) would join him. Truthfully, I didn't see him at the hay for a little over 2 hours, whenever I looked, which was frequent but distant. I didn't let myself stress - there is still some grass (unpalatable now?) and I know from my farm spies that he's good at subversively grabbing hay when he wants to. So he was probably cold and hungry for a little while.

As soon as my friend's lesson ended, I went to bring Mani in so I could put a heavier blanket on him. I found him at the hay feeder, haltered and tried to lead him. He was very pissy about it. I managed to get him moving for a bit, then he put on the breaks again. I pushed a little and he threw his head up and then reared up and twisted away from me. I still easily had him on the lead, he wasn't really even pulling much on it, it was just such a surprise, I didn't think he had it in him! SO not ok!!!

We worked through it, slowly, and I brought him in, changed his blanket and turned him back out for a couple hours. Then I went to bring him in and has less of a fight but he still didn't want to come in at all. I'm not yet sure what is going on. My initial thought is that he had probably finally secured a place at the hay and I was taking him away. Also, I was taking him from his new buddy who lives outside 24/7.

Regardless of the 'why' he has to learn that he has to go where I lead him. I'm just a little unsure of myself when it comes to the best way to teach him this. Given his age and that he's likely still adjusting to his new life, I'm tempted to be kind and take all the time he needs. But another part of me is thinking I need to be strong during those moments so that he learns that listening to his handler is non-negotiable. I guess I'm just not sure which approach is the best to get the result I want.

We shall see what tomorrow brings.

The One.

That's right, I found my horse!  I was prepared for the pre-purchase exam to yeild a deal-breaker since it's happened twice before, but everything in my mind was quiet and calm leading up to the day.

That day was last Wednesday.

My previous experiences prepared me for the worst. This time, I was able to think about the rest of the things that can come up in a pre-purchase and I didn't have to worry about plain old presenting lameness. Good thing about this process taking so long is that when we did get into some of the finer details, I was fairly educated in determing what I was and was not comfortable with.

In a fairly quick whirlwind of organizing, I brought him home Saturday!

Meet Armani!
Hmm, I was going to mention at some point
that Armani toes-in a little - it appears I toe-in a LOT!

Armani is a 3 year old registered Canadian Sport Horse. His sire is Apiro, a Bulgarian Warmblood with lots of Hanoverian and Westphalian in his pedigree. His dam is by Popeye K, a Dutch WB (KWPN approved) with Hanoverian, Dutch WB & Holsteiner in his pedigree. He is younger than I was aiming for but I'm okay with taking things nice and easy. He was started under saddle in August and did a few shows in the hack division, in the ribbons every time and winning the show hack. He actually ended up 7th overall in the hack division with only four shows.

He loaded great and trailered the short 30 minutes to my barn. Yeah, that's right, I put halter fuzzies on for a short trailer ride that wasn't to a show.  I'm living my dream so I figured if I wanted fuzzies, I would have fuzzies, no matter how silly. The really silly part is that the halter I bought for him is padded leather with a raised, also padded, noseband. You know how hard it was to get fuzzies on an already padded leather halter? I gave the task over to my incredibly patient husband.

Armani settled in well with his new herd. I was expecting some drama but they were fairly boring. Perfect! He seems to be a middle-of-the-herd horse so he stands up for himself and therefore doesn't get bullied badly but also doesn't challenge leadership, either.

I was a little worried about the introductions!

He is still a little unsure of himself around the farm but is taking in all the new stuff well. I'm taking it pretty slow but did do a sight-seeing tour under saddle on Sunday and he was super going through all the fields, the galloping track, and the front jump and dressage rings. It was almost all at the walk, with a tiny bit of trot, just to let the tension out.

On Monday night, I handwalked him in the arena so he could check it out before being tacked up. To me, once he's tacked up it's work time, so I wanted him to be able to explore without any mixed-messages. He is every bit the baby he is when it comes to ground work. It just doesn't occur to him that he can't just walk off whenever he wants. He isn't rude though, just clueless and a bit impatient.

Well, that's all of an intro I can manage! Hopefully things will settle into a routine of sorts soon. 

Déjà Vet Check, a Revisit, and the RAWF(!!)

I was working on a post of a more positive tone than the last few. I planned to go over the constructive things I've learned from my horse shopping experiences. Unfortunately I kept leaving it not-quite-finished and then when I'd come back to it, I had to do a bunch of edits.

Then, last Monday, I got to the point of deciding to have a pre-purchase exam for a horse about 3 hours away. I'd been out to try him and he was very, very cute. Quite lazy in the arena but had more forward outside. I was fairly confident that I could improve his response to the aids through training and that he had a pretty great brain to work with. The vet check was a big fail - he was lame. Plus he did some funky things with his hind feet walking up and down a slope (the slope was incidental, not officially part of the exam, but yeilded information all the same). I really liked the vet I hired which was great since I had to go with a clinic in that area. She was very professional and also very much looked out for me. I was much better prepared this time, having gone through it once before, so I didn't have a complete mental lurch, lol. It totally sucked to waste a whole day driving and more money on an exam to once again end up with nothing.

I have to admit that even though it was disappointing, I mostly felt relief. In hindsight, proceeding to vet check on this horse really stressed me out. Partly it was the money but now I wonder if something was telling me he wasn't the one (aside from the laziness). I don't know, it just feels that way...but that could also be a defense mechanism to make the disappointment ok. Doesn't really matter, this horse is out. :-(

That makes 16 horses that I had actually gone out to try myself at least once, a few of them more than once. So what to do?

I happened to stay home sick last Friday. I was going on 3 weeks of a nasty cold that twice looked like it was almost over, only to have a resurgence. Normally, I can't take calls on my cell phone in the office because the signal is interrupted. I also don't give my work number to many people for personal calls. I would have totally missed this call if I had happened to be at work that day.

As it was, I was home and took the call on my cell. It was my coach, calling to mention that the fancy 3 year old I tried back in August was still for sale. She knew I had liked him a lot at that time but also agreed with me that he was on the green side for what I want. Of course, back then I found the grey who was further alongt in his training and was also a gorgeous horse. I had cancelled my second visit to this 3 year old in favor of the 5 year old who was much further along. Of course, then the vetting didn't work out but I guess the greeness factor over-took the fact that I did like this horse.

So I tried him that very night and quite liked him. I was a little concerned because he is somewhat fussy in his head/neck and quite honestly it makes me worried about what people at my barn will say. It doesn't feel anything like Willie but I know it might look that way. I know this horse is like that because he's used to being held up by his mouth and he hasn't really learned to carry himself yet. As much as I'd like to believe the opinions of others don't matter, the fact is I've learned that judgements really do hurt me and undermine my confidence. Still, I know a good horse when I ride one; all that much more since the last time I saw this guy.

I requested a proper lesson on him so I could get a proper feel for where he's at. For now, I'm just going to say that it went very well and I am going to vet him next week. I just want to finally finish a post, so details will have to wait! I want this horse to work out more than any of the others, by far.

I'm off to the Royal Agricultural Winter Fair tomorrow!!!! I grew up watching the RAWF equestrian events on TV every year and now I am *finally* going to be there in person. Pretty sure some serious shopping will happen!

Maybe Forever Horses Take Forever to Find?

I wish I had something exciting to report like, say, a new horse. But no. No. Nope. Nada. No horse for me.  In case you too, dear readers, think surely I must be being picky, allow me to give you a rundown of the last few "prospects."

After canceling my trip out of town to see the wonder-winger and son from my previous post, I immediately set up a viewing with a more local possibility. This was through a girl (and yes, I do mean girl - she was surprisingly young!) who runs an equine sales website and organizes viewings and marketing for sellers. I could find no one that knew anything about her and was hesitant as it was to do business with that type of arrangement. But I'm willing to see how it goes.

So out we go to see a 3 year old gelding last Friday. I'm ok with young and green as long as it's got a good brain. This is roughly how the visit plays out. He's about 16.2/16.3 right now, has been started slowly, is barefoot, lives outside but is also ok coming in at night, appears sound, clean legs. All good, plus he's cute and well mannered. A bit bum-high but he's big and 3, so no biggie. Oh, and he got kicked in the face as a baby so you can see a very slight dent in his face (barely noticeable) and they had to have some teeth pulled on one side cause they were crushed and also when the adults came in we pulled those because they were coming in crowded. Ok, not great news, certainly something to ask the vet about if we get that far. Under saddle, horse is soft and relaxed. Lovely, really. A bit of a push ride but I'm sure with some fitness and a bit of waking up he will be fine. I like him quite a lot. Feel hopeful.

Oh, and seller was Brumby's owner's former coach. She asked me to say "hi" for her. So, I sent a message later on. I got a reply saying this person is a liar and a thief, has been sued for fraud, etc,etc. Hmm, she seemed so nice! Then, as I'm describing this to another friend later that night (my birthday, incidentally), we realize it's the same woman that sold my friend her first horse who, as it turned out, had navicular. Granted, my friend should have gotten xrays but it was her first horse and it seemed sound.

Anyway, not exacly the kind of person I'd like to give my business to.

Then I go see a mare who is 10 and has shown hunters and jumpers successfully, including in Florida. The more I watch the video, the more I like her but I didn't feel anything special for her. They jumped her 1.15m and I was just like "meh" about it. Not that it isn't impressive, and it's certainly more than I need right now, I just didn't feel it for her. They stuff her ears for every ride, which seems odd but I guess is really only a minor thing. What really bugs me is she has tiny feet. Now, she's not a big mare, either (maybe 16hh) but her heels were also crazy long and she had egg bars in front. They tell me that they've never had them on her before but she started developing a quarter crack in Florida last winter so they are supposed to help that grow out. I'm told the farrier isn't worried (he's a well respected farrier in our area, who also travels to and from Florida for his clients in the winter). I'm told she's never been lame a day in her life. My coach says we will need to "extensively" vet anything we buy from these particular sellers. This warning comes on top of our understanding that I will fully vet anything I want to buy, including x-rays, so it's an extra big warning.

Next up - two well-bred mares from someone who drives me crazy and is trying to steal my business in terms of board/coaching/training despite the fact I clearly said I was horse shopping only. I'm only going because the horses are nice.

I am NOT cut out for the business side of the horse world..

The No-Man's Land of Horse Buying.

Honestly, that's what it feels like.  Someone asked me how it's possible that I haven't found a horse yet in this abysmal market. The truth is, I have no idea! On the surface, it seems like they should be easy pickin's but the reality is finding the right one is incredibly hard.

There are plenty of horses within my budget, to be sure. If I was looking for a green (but not necessarily young!) Thoroughbred it would be easy...as long as I didn't care about brain, potential, or how it was started or ridden. I quite like TBs but it would have to be the right one. The other group falls into the super-nice-but-broken category. Or at least needing what I consider significant maintainance. There is the stunning mare who injured her superficial digital flexor tendon or the 9yo gelding who needs adequan injections in his hock. While both might be reasonably fine, I am just not in a place for risk-taking. Perfectly healthy horses are a big enough risk.

So those are the horses well under my budget. Then there is the group that starts at about double my budget! The ones in my range tend to be an odd mix. That, and maybe I'm picky. I don't think I'm too picky though.

I did find two potential options a little ways out of town.  First is an 8 year old, Dutch Warmblood/TB by Tricolore. I'm interested in hearing thoughts on him. I will withhold my thoughts on him for now so I don't bias the few comments I might get, lol.

Then there is a 4 year old who appears to be quite green but I think he has better movement than the older horse (who is, incidentally, the sire). Not sure if he was an oops baby or if they thought of keeping the above guy a stallion or what. I guess we'll see. This guy is recovering from an abscess, so he might not be rideable by Friday.

Can't seem to embed it here, so here's the link if you are so inclined.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RKxGUFYjSfs&feature=share&list=ULRKxGUFYjSfs

Playing by my own rules.

After my first vet-check was surprisingly cut short, I worried immensely about what to do in terms of this horse. It is not every day (or week, or month) that you find a horse that is perfect for you in just about every way. My biggest fear was that he would ultimately vet sound, I'd buy him, and then the problem (whatever it is) might come back a couple months down the line and then I'd be stuck with it. Paranoid? Maybe. But you can hardly blame me for being cautious. That's why we get pre-purchase exams, right?

I decided to go with what I decided that day with the vet - wait a few days, watch him go and continue the vet check if he's sound. I reminded myself that a vet check is just a snapshot and if he was perfectly sound a few days later and then again when the vet was out, I could be pretty darn sure it was a minor, one-time, issue.

My criteria was that he needed to be 100% sound to my eye otherwise there was no point calling the vet back out.  This time, we let him run around at liberty in a large outdoor arena (fenced). He was minorly stiff at first (evenly) but it was a cold morning and he wasn't achy-stiff, just what I would consider very normal muscles needing warm-up. He was happy to move around and cantered both ways, including to the right several times on his own, with zero pressure from us. It was hard to get him to trot; he wanted to stop and look or canter, no inbetween!

Once in the round pen, it didn't take long to see that he was still off to the right, despite the warm-up. It was his owner that said it first, just as I myself had decided that yes, it was still there. It's really very slight...but it's there.

So I stuck to my rules and regretfully said I couldn't proceed at that time. The owners agreed 100% although they too are disappointed since they didn't have any reason to suspect this given that he only displays the issue on a circle. I am still reasonably certain that there is nothing serious going on but I simply can't take the risk, emotionally or financially.

At the end of the day, an otherwise perfectly healthy 5 year old should be able to trot sound on a circle. Period.

So I spent the first few days of this week feeling a little sorry for myself and also feeling like I wanted nothing more to do with this process. Then I started to feel a little grateful because I really would rather something show up before I buy the horse!  I have been very motivated to find something for the fall, as I believe I do a lot of bonding with a horse outside of the arena and think it would be pretty awful to bring a new horse and only be able to ride inside for the winter. But I've realized it's not going to happen on my schedule, it'll happen when it happens.

I have yet another incredible offer and my coach has some prospects outside our local area to go see. I will checking up on the "incredible offer" in the next couple weeks to see just how good it is! It seems all my effort with Willie gave me a reputation and there are a few people who would love me to buy their horse, knowing I'd be a great home. I have to say, that feels pretty good.

Jinxed?

My vet check on the grey was yesterday. All started well enough with the physical exam, things looked fantastic, actually. Then we went outside to watch him go, do flexions, etc. We started in the round pen and he was quite obviously off on his right front. It was subtle and likely only evident on a circle, but it was consistent.

I'm not a superstitious person but I'm begining to feel jinxed. I finally find a horse where every little detail fits perfectly with what I want and he presents with a lameness at vet check! I know, I know, better that it happens now, yada yada. While I know that to be true, it doesn't make it any easier.

I decided not to proceed any further that day. As my vet pointed out in private, it's not up to me to diagnose a lameness if one shows up, that's the owner's job. Also, even if I did do the flexions and xrays, it's possible nothing would show up and we'd be in the same position, or the discomfort in that leg could mask if there are issues in any others. Ugh.

So I will go back to the farm and watch him again on Sunday. If he shows absolute soundness, I have the vet lined up to re-assess and continue on Tuesday. Obviously if he is still off I will cancel the vet call and have some poutine and beer. And then some candy. Probably all while crying. My gosh that's an attractive image, isn't it?

I shouldn't feel as hurt and upset as I am, it's just not rational!  I seem to fall in love too quickly with a good match. I have to say that even though it hurts, I'd still rather love hard and hurt than be more indifferent. It's just not me.

My biggest concern is is this:

Let's say he looks to be perfectly sound on Sunday. Then I have the vet out and everything goes fine, xrays are good etc. So if I had happened to do the vetting that day, I would have never known about the day when he was slightly off. What then? Do I assume he is fine and go ahead with the purchase? I worry about soft tissue stuff because it can come and go...and come back again. I've dealt with this with Hazel most of her life. I know it's not in his hoof because he was amazing through the hoof testers and my vet was very thorough. He was also fine the two previous occasions I've seen him, which were a couple weeks apart themselves.

I have no idea what I'll do. This horse is so perfect for me in every way, it feels silly to write him off for being ever so slightly off one day. But then again, why take the chance. I just don't know what the right thing to do is. I guess I will take it one day at a time. 

I want to kiss that nose for years and years to come.

Is that such an impossible thing to want?